spikegirl

I used to think that we would make it. Was it just the wide-eyed idealism only spoken in youth? I'm not sure when it hit me, but when it did, it was definite. I knew somehow that our love was not a lasting love, but something dressed shabbily in its place.  Okay, maybe it wasn't definite. I just wanted to spare you the heart break… I wanted to spare myself the heart break of those tiny fragile things that float away so suddenly and surely. The charade of walking through the door expecting that anything could change. All those times I let my imagination run so wild and so free as to believe that you were somehow different. Is it true? Do

What are we fighting for? There is no final frontier We've paved and paced these corridors Callouses glued to the pads of our feet Knuckles crusted But we still scrap for a scrap Scratch until it bleeds So does your body sing? Or does your body break? At a slack embrace And brushes of hair You can't quite reach Across the face

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The shadows have cast upon my face, Midnight tears stream away, The dreams we once held so high, Have long since disapeared, Hope has gotten me nowhere, Prayers just the same, And everyday without you, Is driving me insane, I don't want to breathe, It hurts too much, I don't want to smile, I've forgotten how, I just want you to hold me tonight, So I have something to think of tomorrow.

What if we aren't alive? And this is all a halucination, What if this reality, Is just an unreal nation? What if everything we lived for, Was a piece of someone's imagination? Then why do we die? If we have no explanation, I never knew it rained so hard, The sun has escaped my sight, I never knew that stars fell down, I felt the darkness of the night, I never thought I'd grow up, Especially not now, I wish I were as innocent, As I saw myself somehow.

I'm just a little play toy For you to enjoy You pull my strings And when you're bored And I'm not enough You find more toys But eventually I find my way Back into your spotlight To be jerked around And broken down Just a little more Now all my strings have snapped And I'll never find my way back Into the spotlight I once needed But I think I'll be okay As long as I'm not your play toy Anymore

His eyes began to burn, As he rubbbed them vigorously, Intending to dry his tears, But his soul wouldn't let the crying end, He asked, "Could you ever love me like that?" And she said, "I did, but it's all over now," The feeling left her somehow, And before he could say another word, She was down on the ground, Fists clenched tight, Beating the black and white tile, She just cried between her agonizing sighs, She couldn't even breathe, She said, "I'm so sorry I gave up," And he just buried his head in his arms, There was nothing else he could say, The sun began to fade, As it's fire burned out, The passion left them all,

I want to be angry, But under the circumstances, It's just not possbile today, (Hide it all away) With all the memories flashing, With all the words echoing in my brain, What do I do? (Hide it all away) I'm seeing things, And the voices are screaming, Fearful of my peers, (Hide it all away) Heart broken again, I have no friends, They can't see me cry, (Hide it all away) Time to scream, Or scratch, Or cut, Or punch, Anything to hurt myself, For causing this pain, What about the bruises? What about the scars? Maybe I can just hide it all away.

Beauty is a trend, You just need the right car, The right clothes, The right hair, Right makeup, And you're beautiful, Speak with the right tone, Say the right words, Walk the right way, Have the right look in your eyes, And you're beautiful, Let go of all your opinions, Don't think for yourself, Like what they tell you to like, Be beautiful, And don't I wish for just one day, That I could be beautiful? Don't I wish to give up everything I am, To become a person I don't know, Just to be beautiful, Don't I just want to change, Change, Change, Because... Beauty is just a trend.

It holds, the dark and gasping It holds, I fall For hours. Quiet hysteria Slapped once, hard In the face from failing to grasp the gasping hold And drop it A way away For hours. I fall In the light and lacking Calm in toes Rapid heart. Gasping ahead of me, falling in my stomach's Hollow hard-beating- My eyes make shapes in the dark that swing and sway and sound one by one lowing blowing silvery strands of silence basketing my ribs ----------------swallow a dozen drownings. downy visages soft hands, miniatures firm working hands reaching, grasping my gasps holding them holding me.